If you have a blog, at some point someone is going to leave you a really mean, nasty comment, send you a hateful email, or be unnecessarily rude to you on social media.
I don't know about you, but I am a sensitive person who takes things personally. Because of this, it has been quite challenging for me to learn to deal with mean comments as a blogger.
While there's no question I still get upset when people are mean (even after five years of doing this), I have learned to not let it bother me for as long.
So I wrote this post to bring up some points that I think might help you feel better if someone has recently tried to bring you down via your blog. These are things I always remind myself of when it happens to me, making it possible for me to just forget it and move on.
#1 – This person probably doesn't represent the majority of your blog readers. Unless you are getting bombarded with hateful comments and emails, chances are most of your readers do not feel as this one person does.
I know it's hard to see it that way, but you can't let this one person bring you down and make you think that the majority of people probably just think you and your blog suck. It isn't true! Remember that this is just one person.
#2 – This person doesn't really know you, therefore their judgment of you is irrelevant. They don't know your true personality, your good qualities, the things about you that your friends and family appreciate.
They might think they know you from reading your blog, but they really don't. You shouldn't give someone who doesn't even know the real you the power to bring you down and ruin your day.
#3 – This person would probably never say these things to your face. People get really brave when sitting behind their computer screens, don't they? How many people approach you randomly in your real life and start trashing you, that don't even know you?
I'd say not too many. Some people are trolls who enjoy getting a rise out of others when they can do so without being “seen”, and that might be all this person is doing.
#4 – Understand that some people make themselves feel better by tearing others down. It's sad, but true. This is just a personality flaw that a lot of people have. By pointing out what they see as your mistakes and flaws, they are somehow making themselves feel better about their own mistakes and flaws.
#5 – The person may just be having a hard day. You know those days where you just feel annoyed by everything, and it's really difficult to keep that inside? Some find it harder than others to keep it inside, and so they let it out. You may have just been a victim of someone else's day to day frustrations.
#6 – Remember that in the grand scheme of things, this does not matter. A person who doesn't even know you and makes it clear they don't like you, or your blog, is a very small thing.
Ask yourself is it going to make any difference in your life in a week or a month whether this one random stranger on the internet likes you and your site? The answer is no.
#7 – Remember that you can never make everyone happy. It is simply impossible for you to please every single person who visits your site.
No matter how great a job you do, someone somewhere is going to find fault with it, and they may not be so nice about letting you know. Accept that you can't make everyone happy and move on with your life.
How I Handle Negative Comments
In addition to keeping the above seven points in mind, I also happily delete hateful comments from this blog, social media, and my email when I see them come through, without responding.
The sooner the comments are gone, the sooner I can forget about them and get on with my day and the more important things I need to do.
If someone is extremely hateful, uses profanity, does name-calling, etc. then I ban them. I have a comment blacklist that their IP address goes on so no more of their comments can come through on this blog.
If the comments come via email, I block their address so they can't message me again. And if it's on social media — same thing, they just get banned or blocked.
I flat out refuse to allow these people to waste any of my precious time.
Now, there is such a thing as constructive criticism. I do not block or ban people who are critical, but approach it in a friendly, helpful way.
I welcome constructive criticism, and I can thank many of my readers in the past for leaving it because their criticism and tips led to much needed changes I've made over the years on this site.
So that's it! Trust me, I know how it feels. Just remember this too shall pass and don't let it get you down. That's exactly what the negative person wants, so don't give them that.
Do you need some blogging guidance?
Here are some things you can do to get going now:
- Read my post on starting a blog so you have a good idea of what's going to be necessary if you want to go about this the right way and set yourself up for money-making success. Know that blogging is a six figure income for many people, and for others it easily replaces a full-time job or brings in much needed extra money.
- Invest in a blogging course. Trust me that this is all SO much easier if you have someone to walk you through the process step by step. I recommend downloading The Secret Blueprint Blueprint For Blogging Success by Ruth Soukup and The Blog Plan – 12 Month Plan For Blogging Success by Suzi Whitford (both completely free!) for more help.